“life will be better in spring”
Wednesday, April 22, 2009 || 5:16 AM
it's nice that i had fun tonight
mind you, i love stary night but not as well as rainy days.
maybe that sound emo or girly to me.
I JUST DONT CARE.
u know, smtm thing can really make u happy.
i just found it.
the sky tonight is like this.
maybe that sound wow.
but i can tell what i had saw was much more nicer, maybe is my mood, maybe is the people around.
i dunno what make me feel enjoy with them
but i know,
u cant stay alone forever,maybe.
and that turn this out
i just play around wif ah ma
i misses GI so much that time and also
22. i guess he dont like me.
but yet, chooiting is freaking bitch,
i miss him.
so I plan to add more entertainment on tonight
we are just fooling around.
this a conversation between me and my beloved the infamous G-Dragon aka Kwon Ji Yong.
it's alright u miss someone that mean so much too u.
especially a stary night.
there goes more and more
and i decided to msg ji
and he reply me this XD
this what i said distance cant separate us.
the love that irresistible until we wanna hold each other till ends.
so romantic right or maybe a little bit dramatic?
i dont know. i feel both and i'm happy.
u will nvr know how many times i capture those pictures and saying
"ur phone just dont like me?"
i dont remember but full of happiness.
u know what?
this remind me one of my story
there is one day the one under the same sky with me will come to me.
maybe we are far apart.
maybe we are stranger
maybe he is not handsome.
maybe we cross by each other
i had once said before, the one will come.
till now, i still feel it is very romantic.
may i ask?
funny and romance and combine?
if there is any guy u know that combine this 2
mind you, please intro. chooiting is damn curious on this kind of person.
because silent leads to boring, boring leads to lonely.
but funny lead to sound, sound leads to noise, noise leads to annoying
i HATE it.
maybe i'm of them. *dontscoldme*
back to my story in the stary night.
never know and never say never.
ok maybe not funny. but i successfully entertained myself in kampar.
u know, there is so hard to laugh here.
i miss ipoh yet no.
due to stary night, we went to buy 3 bottles of Turbog.Turbog is the new Heineken.
and chooiting is lovin' it.
u need to understand we have no car. cycle like sohai again
just for one bottle of BEER
we do what we wants.
maybe one bottle is not enough but who say we wanna get drunk.
we just enjoy.
maybe, maybe, this is what kampar have but not ipoh.
ipoh less peace.[seng gor teach gehhh, P.E.A.C.E]
chatting like sohai playing like we are drunk
cos ah ma keep saying that she long time din drink beer or whatever.
compliment for her staying so good girl
*clap clap clap*
i'm corrupted long time ago so i dont need one.
CHEH tsk tsk tsk
but i'm still good girl. *acting innocent*
i dunno u played it b4 anot.
i can sure it's fun but embarrassing
try to put ur head down to ur shoulder on ur right or left
den turn 15 round
u will get more hyper
i got 3 witness for this
bcos AHMA went super hyper after that.
she just turn turn turn
almost faint on the floor.
we burst out laughing.
this is VERY VERY VERY ENTERTAINING.
now she is complaining about her bruises
[chooiting is not happy cos someone had cheated me]
i wanna drink all the expensive australian milk now.
cos it taste so good for sleeping.
it's not about how u care but about i forgot the way to trust.
Sunday, April 19, 2009 || 3:21 PM
"We don't look for love because it sucks to be alone watching movies, because it's sad to eat meals alone, because it's nice to cuddle up with someone on rainy days..we look for love because we want to be forgiven..for the sloppy way we dress, for the clumsy way we eat our meals, for bad hair days and for the plainness of ourselves. Love is an act of forgiveness, that for all our imperfections, we are accepted and forgiven."
I want to hold you so closely to my heart that every time it beats ... you know it is for you.
"i like cute guys, not necessarily the hottest guy, but the one that's clumsy, crazy and always makes me smile. you know what i mean? like he might not be abercrombie potential, but he still has all my attention. no, not in the show-off type of way, but in the "i'm totally cool with who i am" kind of way. like he can smile at me and i know we are meant for this, for us. it would be like, he wouldn't always know what to say and when to say it, but he would want to. because sometimes caring enough to try really is enough and for us, it would be. he'd be spontaneous, always doing something i would have never expected would make me fall in love. the kind of guy that is so proud to be yours. you know, the kind of guy that's your best friend, but the only person you could ever see yourself with at the same time. he would love me for everything i am, for real, not just say it like everyone else always does. he would mean it and i wouldn't have to think twice to know he was telling the truth and maybe we'd be exact opposites, but that's what makes our relationship great, working at it. because without the work, it wouldn't really be worth it."
the not happy day.
Thursday, April 16, 2009 || 12:15 AM
even thought we are not close friend
but for me she is still my friend
that's why that touched me
"i never knew looking to the back will bring me tears"
forgive and forget me for being so manja
chooiting mood swing again
i cried infront of justina and pik san.
i dont really know why i cried.
i just found out,maybe i'm tired.maybe i just cant control what am i now.
maybe i still havent get use wif it crying under the rain that can cover what am i now.
because i hate people seeing me cry.
i cry under the rain so no one will know i'm crying.
babe, maybe u dunno,maybe i dunno.
but seriously thanks my housemate for the water
the feel of getting wet.
just like u are being wash from ur problem.
maybe i released or maybe it just reminded me more and more that ur birthday coming soon.
u make me cry more.
because chooiting misses school fun fair.
chooiting misses time in mgs
chooiting miss the time that never come back.
shoulder to tell me not to cry.
sorry that i dint do what i promises
i just realise and i really
for asking myself not to cry not to show my weakness.
even until now, i still havent knowwhy i cry?
chooiting miss the one who will call me and scold the person i hate wif me
just to make me laugh
i wish there is, there is ONE person that can make me laugh.
but because my stubbornness, i still dun like to cry alot
i dont want my smile tat dint touch my eyes.
i dont like and i dont love
no matter who am i.
i wish i can smile laugh more.
crying separate the sadness around
and i dont want to be lidat
maybe i cry might not influence anyone
maybe i cry might irritated someone
maybe no one cares
but the tear drop really hurt a lot
and it's pain deep in the heart and u dont even know the reason why.
u cant find the source of the pain and heal it.
it's like aids.
pretend to be the better one
Friday, April 10, 2009 || 11:41 PM
i think i really good in lying
pretend to be nothing
this week really not my week
uncle jason consider as kick me out from his house
*sound like my problem right?*
i dun care la.
he keep complaining that we make problems to him but first of all
we din do anything
yea, we cooked but we cleaned it as well too
what the fuck that make him non stop babbling?
uhhhhh. he is really son of bitch
okayy, let me list out all problems he mentioned
1.we make the house environment dirty & oily
2.tenant in that house complaining us about the cleanliness too.
[BUT GOT DAMN IT, WE CLEAN THAT HOUSE MORE THAN OUR OWN HOUSE]
and we are much more tidy than upstairs. hairstylist
3. he say electric bill is increasing and it is like rm 600 one month
mind his own business i dont trust the bill is going that high and for god sake he promise us that will no limit on using the electric and water
since he said we have so many problems, i have self-realize what is our problem that make it till this worst
so i ask him
which is the worst one?
den he says: "ALL"
i'm like try to be patient wif him
i dun wan to makes up problem to my parents
but he don seem like appreciate what i did
den i asked him
dont he think that the sentence
"chase u out" is very rude?
he answered me
oh, if lidat den we change it, uncle dun wan to continue contract wif YOU
so fine, i dun wan to debate wif him la
den i wanna go jor and i asked him to give me time to find house
(notes: who the hell will still say so when u are bullying by someoneasshole lidat?)
den when wanna go back tat time, he still saying that is our problem
and turn back and shoot him back
u dint do what u promise as well
1. he din give me the room that he promised he'll give me
2. he din set on the cctv in front of our house like he use to promised every parents that come and see house
3. he din check the door weather close or not cos he is not here all the time
4. he promised he'll be there for us 24/7 that anything happened to use like sick or wateva so that he can send us to the nearest clinic and hospital.
NAHHHH, he will only at kampar when there is the time for us to pay rent
like: start & end of the month, jan and may intake.
so ended up there is no more turning point for us
not him and me.
i dont like him deep in my heart
and know i hate him
i dont curse him but i know, KARMA is always here
what make me sad is everyone is calling their parents and say about uncle jason
so that their parents will like helping her own daughter.
i did called my parent to inform them that i'll moving out
my dad will never stand on me when come to this case
he will always say her daughter problem
and i got tired so i always know how to protect myself instead of asking parents to do so.
i never wanna to feel disappointment again.
it's not like they dont understand me maybe, just maybe, i'm the one who dont understand them.
Oh ya, today, i went for ACS school play
and the drama tittle is
"The Phantom of the Opera" dramatic
but mind it, there is no ROMANCE when i was watching it, more than
yes, since it is a school play obviously there are students show time.
they are cute cos the still look like student.
and yes, acs is where yijun studying, so for sure we'll meet but just meet like stranger. avoid each other.
this is me lee chooiting.
after the show end,
they are planning to go yum char.
and again, i'll run away from my peers with goodbye and so on so on
and u'll see my siu sa background taking key and chao.
chooiting is so SIU SA
i guess i'm really coming back.
wait me, my life.
the last last last thing,
i will post the pic today for at the next post,
so wait me.
Saturday, April 4, 2009 || 9:40 PM
Chooiting is currently addicted to Twilight by Stephenie Meyer
at the same time falling in love with one of the sentence's in the book
If I could dream at all, It would be about you. And I'm not ashamed
like what miss. tan said
somehow i wish i can irrecoverably in love with someone
the saddest thing is
we are selfish creature
we'll never give in before other give out
this is what we are
or this is what i am
ah ma asked me to go for acs play
and my answer is Yes!
chooiting don't want to run away anymore at least not at where i belongs to
it's not an excuse anymore
so what if we see each other?
i don't care and i don't mind
i got the power that stay me strong for this time
i still taking fate as if it is very impossible and necessary for me
mind me for so childish.
u know what?
even i tot I'm quite fond someone but i still don't get the feeling of -fly up to the sky-
oh yea, i don't like his name
it sounded so
i don't know how to describe maybe this is a nice name but not for him
chooiting is so berfoya foya
i cant even remember how many guys i told peoples that i liked
he is one of them.
maybe the % i put on him more
I'm not gonna trust them anymore
lie me like I'm 3 years old girl
but i might still miss him
it's very bad to just get a guy to have date but not love
at least i think this is so immoral
chooiting is speaking bout moral
yea, i think so
but i have admit I'm
like some crazy woman or whatever it is.
i stay at kampar this weekend for some stupid cost accounting quiz
i know i really hate counting
hate everything with number
I'm going to cry.
cry until i feel it is enough
i always know I'm weird
at least i think myself is weird.