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*smile* that never come back
Thursday, February 7, 2008 || 6:16 PM
today is th first day of cny but i woke up very late but din get scolded by my parent..
yeah~ that's my new year luck!! i believe that~~
keep on asking for ang pow cos ystd i filled in hardly!!
den we go my grandma house but actually my grandma has pass away on nov 2007
every Chinese new year we will usually gather at my grandma house and she will give us rm6 an ang pow...
nvr change for so many years!!
but what is not in my expectation is my mum and my aunty cry~~ i know why cos they haven't come out from the true of my grandma has pass away..
why do people cry when someone pass away??
or why we will feel that heart broken when we looking at people who will talk, eat enjoy with us suddenly sleep forever??
cos we know the smile from the people will never come back and never with us anymore~
chinese tradition is when someone pass away, we must not cry~ cos the spirit of the died people will not willing to leave us!!
i remember that day~ actually everyone is sad but they try their best to not let tears come out except children!!
i told my mum not to cry cos grandma will not really wanna see us like that!!
but at the end everyone cry when they give the last respect to my grandma~ cos we ady know that v cannot change it anymore, and she will also never come back to us!!
the feeling that someone close with us leave u will really go into ur heart and never never lost!!
grandma asked me before if 1 day i die will u cry like when chut chut lost!!
i didn't answer her!!
i dunno why? chut chut and my grandma are totally different~~ cos i know people will die 1 day so expect this will happen to everyone~~
but chut chut lost is different cos it is not in my expectation
maybe i'm childish to face this kind of things~
and lastly i get it~ people will leave us even though we dun wan it to come~
try ur best to keep the perfect memory with her in your heart~
i don't actually like people who are fake~
like my sisters~
omg.. they are just making me to feel that their are annoying~
but anyway i try to think they are not purposely to make me feel so..
once a people die here spirit will always keep in our hearts..
as long as u keep her in your heart
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and i happy that my dad have give me another 200$$
hurray!!! love him so much~~
but i;m actually getting for my previous post that are failed~~
1st= canot save [so i lazy think bout tat]
2nd= closed by my sis[i hope i can hack her password]
3rd= closed by my bro accidently [mad-ing!!!]
i wan a blessing year
<3 <3 <3 <3
